One of the chief highlights of an Indian wedding, before the actual marriage ceremony, is the ritual of Sagai. This ceremony marks the official ‘asking’ of the bride’s hand by the bridegroom’s family. Rings are exchanged between the bride and the bridegroom during Sagai to seal the union of the two individuals as well as their families. This function takes place only post the Roka ceremony and can be held either days, or even months, before the actual wedding date.
The Ceremony
Sagai is traditionally held at the bridegroom’s home where the family members and friends of both the bride and the bridegroom are invited for the ceremony. The bride’s family visits the bridegroom’s family with lots of immaculately wrapped traditional gifts, sweets and dry fruits, and tikka material to perform the ritual of Sagai/Kurmai/Mangni. Nowadays, the tikka ceremony has been combined with the Sagai ceremony. The tikka material that the bride’s family carries to the bridegroom’s home consists of a silver tray with a few grains of rice on it, a silver bowl containing some saffron, 14 chuharey (dried dates) nicely wrapped in a silver foil and a coconut covered in a golden leaf.
At the beginning of the tikka ceremony, the bridegroom’s sister(s) put a fine, silk palla (long scarf) around his neck which he then holds open on his lap when the bride’s family comes to present him with various gifts and sweets. The bride is also wrapped with an ornate chunni (stole). This chunni could be a family heirloom as well, which is passed on from generation to generation. The bride’s father then applies tikka on his would-be son-in-law’s forehead and blesses him. He then fills the palla with sweets and dry fruits, and presents the bridegroom with a gold Kara, some money and/or other gifts like a watch or a gold chain.
In return, the bridegroom’s family also presents the bride’s family with baskets of varied dry fruits like cashew nuts, almonds, coconut pieces, chuahara, raisins, apricots, etc. The bride is also presented with jewelry which her mother and her would-be sister-in-law help her wear. A tiny dot of mehendi is then applied on her palm for good luck.
Once all the aforementioned rituals are done, the respective fathers of the bride and the bridegroom put a garland over each other, known as milni (meeting), to mark an end to the different rituals of the day. The Sagai ceremony then usually ends with the exchange of the rings between the bride and the bridegroom. All the guests present at the Sagai ceremony, including the bride and the bridegroom, are then distributed ladoos, various sweets, and dry fruits.
